Lifes Current Structure

I always said, that if I did at pregnant when I was young age completely unplanned - then I would blog about it.

On the 29th of April 2010 I arrived home from my little trip of England. I'd been wanting to have a holiday away from Alastair (my ex-partner/boyfriend) and to get to see some of my friends' universities, staying in halls etc.

After the Volcanic Ash had its turn in shaking up my planned travel I somehow managed to get to Dublin at 7am on the off chance that I 'might' get onto a packed ferry, which I did.

During the holiday I spent a staggering 20 hours on coaches (which I discovered are a hell of a lot cheaper than trains) and visited Derby, Norwich, London and Falmouth.

I ran out of money twice, slept with my ex (more than twice) and did a load of young, studentish things - which I am now extremely grateful for - as it looks likely that I will never stay in halls and be that kind of student.

I had suffered bloating/sickness for most of my holiday and was a bit confused that I didn't get my period (I had missed one, and had taken a test - which was negative - two weeks later). I thought nothing of it, I was stressed, I was on the minipill and all these things can affect your monthly cycle.

After missing two periods (something which has happened once before with no ultimate consequence) I decided I would take another test, so did so after returning home and finding the house empty.

It was instantly positive.

I've seen a lot of pregnancy tests, not because I have unprotected sex (I do not, as a rule) but because knowing that I'm not pregnant stops me worrying and brings on my period if it is late.
Usually I pee and I wait, and I watch the test line show up, wait a bit more, then bin it.

This time a line started to become visible far lower than I had expected and I started to shake. I was terrified and instantly rang my friend to try and calm myself down. She suggested I take another test.

Another instant positive.

So over the last 10 days I’ve been coming to terms with the idea of becoming a Mum at 21, I've developed a less-than-pleasing life structure which involves watching lots of 4od, eating a little, sicking a little and working occasionally.

I have a dedicated toilet at work for being sick into. At some point I will try and get a picture and talk in length about this beloved object of mine (no sick in picture).

It's also worth mentioning that I have no idea how the method of birth control failed and that I do not know who the father of my child is.

So, I'll keep you posted.